Celebrity Sightings!

I know, I know, I know, I'm a terrible blogger lately! I get up every day with the intention of writing, if not something deep and compelling and fascinating, at least something vaguely retarded so at least I can keep a steady stream of posts going, but most days I just fail miserably. So, my apologies. Although perhaps my near-constant disappearing act is fascinating all of you, and enticing you to stick around and keep reading.

I'm so good at rationalizing crap.

Anyway, this will not be a deep, thoughtful, elaborate post, but rather a continuation in our "Celebrity Sightings!" pseudo-montage. There are big things at hand for me right now, but I'm hesitant to say too much until I have everything set in stone. So, until then, enjoy the celebrity onslaught - 9.5 celebrities this update! And no, I didn't see Mini Me, just wait.

Sophie Monk!
She was, of course, in workout gear, apparently getting ready for a run along Sunset Blvd. Impressive, seeing as she ended in in San Diego later that day.

Rita "Mrs. Tom Hanks" Wilson
Who was much nicer than I thought she'd be

Tim "The Toolman Taylor" Allen!

John "Tyra's Boyfriend" Utendahl
He's like 6'7", he was one big, stylish dude


KEVIN "SCREAM" WILLIAMSON OMG
I seriously almost freaked out and begged him to take me under his wing and make me a star, which would be fine because, hell, if he can make Katie Holmes famous, then he can do anything


Holy Shit, it's Fucking Aaron Sorkin!
I think he might take the title for Awesomest Celebrity I've Met So Far


Tracee Ellis "Diana's Daughter" Ross
Who, apparently, is on the UPN show Girlfriends; I had no idea but she just kind of hung out and enjoyed herself, so I never would've known anyway - I like that


David "Bud Bundy" Faustino
I saw him outside of The Laugh Factory, and I just wanted to put him in my pocket


CHARLIE MOTHERFUCKING "DAY MAN" DAY
Words cannot even express my excitement; that was the closest I've ever come to kidnapping someone and making sure they can never leave my basement/bathroom/bedroom. Again.


And finally, my 1/2 Celebrity!
Why, it's none other than THIS sexy piece of man meat:

Adam Rodriguez!!

I'm only giving him a .5 because I didn't technically meet him in the sense that I walked up to him in person and grabbed him an molested him, but I did get to talk to him on the phone, and I do believe we established a very special, very tender bond. Now if only he'd stop calling the cops and come hang out with me...

So this brings us to our current tally of:
Jim: 15
Chelsea: 28.5

Now Jim cries at night when he doesn't think I can hear him. Pussy.

10 Things I've Learned About LA

1. 1 in every 10 cars on the road is a VW Bug. I didn't even know those were still being produced

2. Elvis impersonators like wandering down from Hollywood Boulevard to hang out on our street

3. Seeing as meth leaves people licking the sidewalks and screaming uncontrollably, it's probably not the kind of drug you'd think about picking up for recreational purposes

4. Celebrities can be harder to pick out than you'd think

5. Palm trees can grow to be really fucking huge

6. Grocery shopping at Ralph's at 1am causes people to look at you as though they're trying to discern whether or not you're relevant/famous

7. Jim and I are the only people in the entire city who walk to work

8. You have a 1 in 100,000,000,000,000 shot at finding a legit parking spot at any place and time

9. Men are shockingly brazen, and will pull over to the side of the road to ask you out on dates

10. Wearing aviators inside does not make you appear famous, because everyone and their mother is wearing shades, even if it's 2am and you're in a night club

The (foot of the) Hills

So I've finally forced myself to sit down and write out a legit post (because as much as I love my Celebrity Sightings! there has actually been excitement in my own life as of late) and now I'm posting live from my very own balcony. Jim and I officially moved into the new apartment on July 2nd, and while we've yet to take pictures of the inside, I did post some pictures on my Houston, We Have Liftoff post.

While there was nothing quite as comparable as finally having my first, very own apartment in DC (because as overwhelming as the prospects of paying rent and bills and living on my own were, let's face it, the idea of having your very own apartment and being able to do whatever you want, whenever you want, is mind blowing), this apartment has it's own unbeatable feel to it. By this point, I knew what I wanted out of an apartment, and having Jim and I living together meant that we had the funds and ability to get more than a tiny little box apartment on the edge of the downtown/commercial zone.

And the excitement I felt when the landlord finally finished all his paperwork and left us alone in the apartment is hard for me to even explain. Moving cross country and starting everything over again certainly had the very real potential to be disastrous, but Jim and I have taken to it like fish to water. Or like overweight, under-loved daddy-issue-riddled women to the Seventh Veil strip cabaret down the block. This is Hollywood, after all.

Actually, it's only sort of Hollywood; our apartment is off of the massive La Brea/Sunset intersection, and we're fabulously (seriously) sandwiched between Hollywood and Sunset Boulevards, in our own little Hollywood/West Hollywood world. Because of the area's youthful feel and strategic placement between the two neighborhoods, it really is one of the coolest areas around. And it certainly doesn't hurt that we're right near Grauman's Chinese Theater and the Kodak Theater (hello, Oscars!) ...


... and yet also within walking distance of the Sunset Strip and Sunset Plaza (hello, where I work!) and the West Hollywood nightlife.



Also, we're right behind the Jimmy Kimmel Live studios, so when the bands play (and they play outside on the lot/stage behind the studio) we totally get free concerts. Beat that.


But as much as I love being spoiled and rubbing it in other people's faces, this post really isn't about that. At this point in my life, my closest friends are all really getting their shit together; they're literally spread all over the world, figuring out their lives, going to law school and grad school, starting businesses, cementing relationships, and everything else that goes hand-in-hand with growing up. And for me, LA is growing up.

Yes, okay, so I hostess for an income, and I spend my days going on auditions, but I've never felt better. DC was eye opening in the fact that it made me become an adult - for the first time in my life I paid rent, I paid bills and loans, I lived on my own, I handled my own income, I worked a 9-6 job - but it also showed me exactly what I didn't want out of life: I didn't want to work at a desk job where i was under appreciated and thought that because I happened to have boobs and a vagina (albeit very tiny boobs) I was an idiot; I didn't want to work in a town focused solely on politics; and I didn't want to do the same thing day in and day out, because after a few months, I was convinced I was wasting some of the best years of my life.

So here I am. And I have to admit, as silly as I sometimes feel going on auditions, they're rapidly becoming like crack; seriously, once you have a taste, you can't stop doing it. I still keep up with modeling, and recently I've gone to a few open calls and auditions for projects (a Hollister shoot, a catalog shoot, and an ad campaign, etc etc) and even auditioned to be a Deal or No Deal! model. Long story short about Deal! is that we stood in line for 3.5 hours, for a 25 second interview. At least I made some friends and got a tan, seeing as how we were in a 500+ person line stretched down Hollywood Blvd. Awesome!

But what I've been really enjoying are the acting auditions. I've done some reality show auditions, including Scream Queens (omg VH1 I love you!) and a currently-untitled CBS improv-reality-sketch show, as well as some indie movie auditions (my favorite so far was for a vampire queen who needs to come to LA to get her star-struck brother back so they could go ahead and take over the underworld... I promise, this was a comedy) and 2 feature film auditions.

Yes, my acting experience is limited, but there's something retardedly thrilling about getting a monologue 2 minutes before your audition, and then going up in front of a group of people and going all out for it. Even if I never get a call back, at least I did it - it's one hell of an adrenaline rush.

And besides, it ties in with Jim and Chelsea's 2 Goals in Life:

1) Befriend a celebrity - any celebrity
2) Have our own IMDB pages, and legit ones that are actually sanctioned by the site, not something we hack in and then have deleted twenty seconds later

So now all I need is for someone to let me have a tiny bit part in one movie, and then to get my foot in the door and have another one, and so on and so forth, and, some day, end up jumping up and down on Oprah's couch, screaming my love for some questionably-talented Hollywood starlet. This is West/Hollywood, after all - the place where dreams come true.

Celebrity Sightings!

First of all, I know, I know; I promised you all a real update the other day, and being my usual unreliable self, I totally flaked out. I had the best of intentions at least, I promise. I was going to make a new update tonight, but I figured my celebrity sighting was so damn good that it should be my top story for awhile. Also, I think I'm kind of high from last night still, so I better keep the actual updates for another time. Anyway!

The fact that tonight's Celebrity Sightings! celebs ate together - like, at one table, apparently being quite chummy - still makes me stop, frown a little, and scratch my head. I know there are a lot of odd celebrity friendships out there (Kristen Johnson and Tatum O'Neal, JLo and Leah Remini, Tom Cruise and Xenu) but this was really one of those pairings that you have to wonder just how in the hell they not only met, but became close enough to want to venture out in public together.

But fuck all that, because one of the celebs I met tonight is gonna make you cream your pants, ladies, and you're all gonna be super fucking jealous, cause tonight I met:

MC-fucking-STEAMY!!

That's right, ladies and gentlemen, Eric Fucking Dane himself!
I'm also jealous of myself, if that's possible, cause goddamn but he was ridiculously hot.

And with Erin Dane comes, inevitably:

Rebecca Gayheart

Yes, his lovely wife. Who, like every female in Hollywood, is thinner and (much) shorter in person than you'd expect.

And speaking of "shorter than you'd expect," this couple ate with
one of THE most RANDOM celebrities in Hollywood:

Mr. Chris Kattan

...

My thoughts exactly.

Literally, the first thing that went through my head was that goddamn scene from Corky Romano, where he's wearing the Girl Scout outfit and bleats out, "do you guyyys wannnt sommme coookies???" It was kind of awkward, to say the least.

So this brings our currently tally to:
Jim: 15
Chelsea: 20

Suck it, Jim.

And, for all you loyal readers, I'd like to end this post with an epically awesome Rebecca Gayheart picture, from the masterpiece that was Dusk till Dawn 3:

Fabulous!

Celebrity Sightings!

I promise I'll have a real update tomorrow, but for now it's time for...

...Celebrity Sightings!

Tonight was a busy celeb night at work, and I racked up:

Former California Governor Grey
"It's Awkward that Schwarzenegger's More Popular Than Me"
Davis

Eriq "ER Dr. Benton " LaSalle

Fabulously Awesome Robert Leonard from Heroes
(seriously he was awesome in person)

And

STOCKARD FUCKING CHANNING!
She is still super hot, even after all these years

Which brings us to our current tally of:
Jim: 15
Chelsea: 17

WHICH MEANS I AM NOW WINNING - IN YOUR FUCKING FACE, JIM!!!


Rizzo the original Head Bitch In Charge approves of this.

Houston, We Have Lift Off

Okay, so I just got unexpectedly called into work for like 3 hours, but before I go, I want to announce that:

WE FINALLY HAVE AN APARTMENT! And it's really fucking nice. And we're like 99.99999% sure that this fabulously hot piece of ass lives there too:

Yes, that is Bernard from LOST. We think we bumped into him at a (get ready for an overwhelming cuteness factor) resident BBQ out by our brand new luxurious pool. And speaking of brand new luxurious pools, here, take a look at the place and seethe with jealousy:





The first picture is what the outside of the apartment USED to look like - now it's very colorful and funky, and much cuter than that drab gray and whatever. It's right off the busy Sunset/La Brea intersection, sandwiched awesomely between Sunset and Hollywood Boulevards. And the back side of the building has a view of the Jimmy Kimmel Live set, so when the bands play in the outside lot, we get free, live concerts. Amazing.

Tomorrow morning I'm going in to drop off the deposit check, and then The Great Move In commences! Even though I have an audition for a tv show at 1:30, and have to work at 5:30. Oops. At any rate, at least I'll have more sleep under my belt, seeing as I'm running now on about 3 hours, and I think I'm getting into the delirium phase. At least work will fly by!